UNDERSTANDING THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN BULLYING AND UNKIND BEHAVIOR

Bullies, without a doubt, are cruel to those around them. They slap, shove, and call others by their first names. They may also participate in relationship aggression, cyberbullying, and other forms of bullying. Many people don’t seem aware, however, that bullying isn’t the only form of child abuse. Young children, especially those still in the process of learning how to get along with people, have a hard time doing so. It’s up to adults, including parents, teachers, and other caregivers, to show them how to be nice, resolve disagreement, and be inclusive.

A nasty remark or action from a child is not uncommon. The behavior needs to be addressed, but labeling them a bully is unacceptable. Instead, focus on distinguishing between bullying and unpleasant or hurtful behavior.

There must be an imbalance of power and a pattern of cruel behavior for something to be considered bullying. Children that bully are typically larger, older, or more powerful than their victims. In addition, they do or say numerous hurtful things to the intended victim. Examples include mocking, name-calling, and disparaging the victim regularly. Bullies also seek to injure the victim in some way so that they may exert even more authority and control over the victim.

Although many parents want to identify every harsh act their children commit as bullying, unfortunately, this is not always the case. While bullying is a serious issue, the term itself loses its meaning when it’s diluted. And that’s something that no one wants to happen. We want people to take bullying seriously when we talk about it. People cease paying attention if every mean thing a youngster does is characterized as bullying.

It’s important to note that not all mean behavior should be classified as bullying.

Negative Expressions of Thoughts and Emotions

For the most part, children are honest about their feelings and opinions. Children, in particular, will tell the truth without considering the ramifications. To help kids avoid offending others, an adult should teach them how to ask and say appropriate questions and things.

It’s critical that children who have been subjected to hurtful statements learn how to express their sentiments to the person who made the remarks in the first place. Giving children the means to express their anger and frustration teaches them to take responsibility for their feelings and stand up for themselves when treated unfairly.

Ignoring Others

It is normal for children to form deep friendships with a small number of people. While children should be polite and kind to everyone, expecting them to be close friends with every youngster they know is unrealistically idealistic. They should be.

If your child isn’t invited to every event or function, it’s perfectly normal. Inevitably, events such as birthday parties, field trips, and playdates will be missed when they are not included on the guest list. This is not the same as bullying, which involves ostracizing people. Remind your children when they feel excluded that they must sometimes choose not to include everyone.

Being left out vs. being excluded are two whole different things. A child’s purpose is to injure someone else when they exclude someone else. They may even share pictures and remark about how much fun they had at the event in front of your youngster. Exclusion, which is a form of bullying, occurs when this occurs.

Conflicting Feelings

A typical component of adolescence is learning how to handle disagreement. Learning to resolve conflicts peacefully and respectfully courteously is the most important thing you can do for your children. A dispute or argument with a close friend does not constitute bullying, even if the children involved make nasty comments. Bullying does not include minor fights or disagreements with classmates.

Teasing

Playful, pleasant, or mutual teasing is common among children’s friends and siblings. The laughter harms no one’s feelings. As long as both youngsters think it amusing, teasing is not bullying. Bullying occurs when teasing is cruel, rude, and/or repetitive.

Bullying occurs when a person deliberately intends to inflict pain on another person. Teasing can turn into bullying if children:

  • Make sexist remarks or disparage others.
  • Make fun of others by referring to them by names.
  • Disseminate false information.
  • imply a threat

Playing Unfairly

It’s not bullying to want games to be played a certain way. Assertiveness, leadership skills, or even selfishness may be to blame for this ambition. But if a youngster is constantly threatening or physically harming other children when things don’t go their way, then bullying has occurred. It’s no longer about being self-centered; it’s about being in charge of your own sphere of influence.

Teach your kid how to deal with bossy peers if they have them around. Also, make sure your children learn how to form healthy social relationships. Discuss the pitfalls of false friends with them. Controlling friends can be found when one of their friends refuses to do anything but their own way.

Observe your child’s nasty actions and identify each one accurately. Keeping things in perspective is good for both you and your child. As a result, you’ll be more prepared to manage the situation in a way that allows your child to develop and learn from it. Steps you can take to help your child deal with and heal from bullying should be taken if your child experiences it. The school’s principal and other administrators must be informed if something like this occurs again.

Helpful related article: How Obesity Leads To BullyingThe Role of Peer Pressure in BullyingHow Cyberbullying is Perpetrated Under the Cover of Subtlety