Unfathomable affection and awe-inspiring exhilaration? You’re prepared for these new-mom feelings. Introspection? Not really. Here are eight common concerns a new mom may have and how to manage them, that I’ve dealt with successfully, along with some expert advice and advice that worked for me.
When your newborn starts crying, it’s normal to freak out. Not being affected by it would take the nerve of a bomb-squad pro. However, you’ll be able to do it (or close to it). As distressing as it is right now, you will quickly discover that your baby will not die when left crying and that even if you are unable to respond immediately, it will not harm her. This saved my sanity the moment I came to that conclusion.
Even if your baby may be wailing, it doesn’t mean she’s distressed or upset.”
Because we cry, it’s natural to feel this way. On the other hand, Infants do it to express various emotions, including exhaustion, coldness, wetness, boredom, hunger, and overstimulation. Think of her sobbing as a means for her to communicate with you rather than a sign that anything is wrong.”
You’ll often be able to tell what your baby needs based on the sound of her cries as you build a routine with her.
Even if she cries nonstop or you’re stumped about what’s wrong — you’re still at a loss. Take some time to relax, and calm down before returning to her.
I Hate My Baby on Occasion
Think about the fact that you’re not the only one who feels this way. To make matters worse, many women believe that doing these things should fill them with nothing but happiness. But the truth is: this is a lot of work! Most mothers have some degree of ambivalence about [their overwhelming obligations].
I’m exhausted from not getting enough sleep.
There is a common refrain among parenting experts and pediatricians: get some shut-eye while your child is fast asleep in a crib or bassinet. The problem with other mothers is that it’s daytime, and it’s difficult to relax while the sun is shining, no matter how tired you are. Those who are unable to nap will find a variety of alternative activities to engage in.
If you’re having difficulties falling asleep when trying to nap, try turning off the ringer and dimming the lights in your room. You can use some earplugs to block out noises that keep you awake. Avoid sleeping for long periods, and don’t take naps. Slow-wave sleep occurs when you sleep for more than an hour or so. At the end of this phase, you’ll feel worse than you initially.” Take one 30- to 45-minute snooze a day, and feel more alert and energized.
I want to get rid of the baby’s weight.
I’ve heard this a lot from new mothers. If you make just a few minor adjustments, you can expect to shed pounds. First and foremost, don’t stress about fitting in a 45-minute workout.
Decide on multiple 10- to 15-minute intervals throughout the day to break it up into smaller chunks. If it doesn’t seem overwhelming, you’re more likely to persist with it. Go for a quick walk, play some strength-training exercises while the baby sleeps, or put on a Pilates DVD while she plays. A babysitter may be available at your gym, or you can ask a partner to watch the kids while you work out or go for a swim.
Do you want to eat better? Fleming emphasizes the importance of foresight when answering this question. The weekend is the best time to make a considerable quantity of grilled chicken breasts, vegetarian lasagna, or stir-fry so that you may eat well throughout the week. In addition, make sure you have a healthy snack on hand. Stock your work bag with dried fruit and nuts, or keep an apple and granola bar in the car for quick snacks.
You wouldn’t leave the house without ensuring that your infant has enough food to eat. You should do the same!
I’m not confident in my gut feelings.
No one knows what they’re doing when they become first-time parents. Even still, you fervently desire perfection.
Consequently, many moms defer to Dr. Expert’s wisdom rather than paying attention to what they genuinely believe is correct. On the other hand, you spend more time with your child than anyone else. Trust yourself and follow your instincts. Do what you think is best and, if it fails, call your doctor or trusted friends.
TMI is another thing that can cause you to second-guess your judgment (too much information). You can open a book, go online, or text your family members when you have a baby-related query. When you have all of this advice at your fingertips, it can be pretty helpful, but there is a point at which it becomes overwhelming.
Even if your instinct is mistaken, it will not harm your child’s life. You’ll switch things around a bit. The best part is that everyone can benefit from each other’s experiences. That’s part of what strengthens your relationship with your child and makes you a better mother.
I need a break from breastfeeding.
Take a break, honey; it’s the time! And don’t worry about it! This is something you deserve, and it’ll make you a better mother. At the end of the evening, you’ll feel ten times better. I see Jack in a different light after a bit of distance. Having him in my life has given me a renewed sense of patience and vitality. Even more so, babies have an incredible ability to read our moods. She’ll sense it if you’re in a good mood, too. We all want to raise a happy and confident child at the end of the day.
My house is in shambles.
All the moms I spoke to agreed that hiring a cleaning service was the best option.
If hiring a professional is out of reach, consider doing a small amount at a time. Don’t worry about it if you don’t have the energy. Are binkies and board books all over the floor a problem? No. A small number will only see them, people. If they do, what will happen to them? I’ve discovered that it can have a positive ripple effect on other mothers. As soon as they find out that your house isn’t flawless, it helps them relax and realize that they don’t have to be mini Martha Stewarts.
My Marriage Concerns Me.
In general, babies tend to be adorable little sex killers.
You’ll have to put up a fight with this one. However, you can (and should!) make time for your love life. Before the birth of our baby, my husband and I made a pact to go out on Saturday night dates every week. Also, we made it a rule (this is crucial) to avoid talking about the baby at all costs. When days go by without one of you saying a word to the other, your bond may begin to fray. Are you not quite ready to say goodbye to your infant yet? Then invite your date over to your place. Take care of a great dinner and a bottle of wine once the baby is in bed.
Remember that whatever you decide to do, You must do it regularly. It isn’t easy to maintain a long-term relationship with just a few hours a month of communication. Sexuality, on the other hand, can be a more complex problem. Hey, you’ve had a long day. If you’re lying in your bed, all you want to do is sleep.
And if your baby spends much of the day on your lap, cuddling and breastfeeding, you may feel ‘touched out by the time you go to sleep. To avoid exhaustion, have your husband help with the baby’s physical care (feeding him or cuddling him when he cries). It may sound corny, but pick a night when you’ll have sex regardless of the circumstances.
Even if you don’t have a whim for it, you’ll get there eventually. Sex may become a sanctuary for many new parents if they get their sex life back on track following the birth of a child.